Seeking his brothers love

This started as a humble attempt to answer a study guide question for the Bible class, but as I was looking in different sources for an answer it kind of grew into a small essay that may be worth sharing in this blog.
What does the phrase וְהוּא נַעַר (and he was a youth) add when the Torah already specified Yosef’s age? 

The phrase וְהוּא נַעַר literally means that he was a youth, but can also mean a servant, an errand boy.  As explained by Ibn Ezra, his older brothers, sons of Leah, made Joseph a  servant to the sons of Bilhah and Zilpah with the goal to specifically humiliate him. Rashi wrote that Joseph behaved childishly, fixing his hair and touching up his eyes so that he would appear handsome.  Ramban maintains that it is natural to call Yosef a youth since he was the youngest and fairest of the brothers (except for Benjamin who was still a child). 

The word נַעַר, “youth”, can be understood in two ways.  On one hand נַעַר can have a negative implication of childish, foolish, immature.  On the other hand, נַעַר, youth, could mean pure, uncorrupted, unspoiled, untouched by cynicism, trusting, exalted.  It indicates someone so pure that he does not yet understand the evil inclination of others, who is misunderstood as either arrogant or insane, an impractical dreamer.  A youth is the one who is in awe of the beauty of this world and of the world to come, one who can just step outside, breathe in the spring air and say ‘Oh, wow!’

On one hand Joseph telling brothers his dreams comes across as foolish, he already knows that they hate him, why stoke the fire?  On the other hand, coming from a holy soul such as Joseph, by telling his dreams he was giving the brothers an opportunity to repent from jealousy and hatred, to realize that he brings them a message from the One Above.  In sefer Bereishit the first man plagued by jealousy and hatred was Cain, and Hashem gives him an opportunity to do teshuvah before he killed his brother 4:6-7: הֲלוֹא אִם תֵּיטִיב שְׂאֵת (surely if you improve you'll be elevated). So is Joseph giving his brothers an opportunity to improve, to change their ways before they harm him.  He tells his dream the second time to his father in their presence, hoping that Jacob can influence his children, but it takes 22 years for the teshuvah to happen, for brothers to transform and to grow to their full spiritual potential. 

Who is right and who is wrong?  Who is foolish and who is wise?  Is Joseph foolish to trust his brothers, or are the brothers foolish and naive, letting go an opportunity to transform themselves, to avoid a terrible mistake that they'll regret for the rest of their lives.  The brothers are concerned by the food they'll eat today, but Joseph ends up the sovereign who provides them all food tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.  He is not trading bargains at the moment, but ends up owning all the wealth of Egypt. 

The scene when Jacob sends Joseph to Shechem to see his brothers vaguely reminds of the Akeida Itzhak.  Just as Abraham answers הִנֵּנִי (21:1) when called for a test, so Joseph says הִנֵּנִי (37:13) when sent to confront his brothers.  The father and son take upon themselves a double martyrdom to allow for the brothers the ultimate opportunity to do teshuvah.  Returning to the pit and realizing that their brother is gone, witnessing the sorrow and despair of their inconsolable father they grow to understand the magnitude of the loss, the enormity of their misdeed. 

Why Joseph has not sent a word to his father that he was alive?  Because the suffering of Jacob was as much part of the divine plan to bring the brothers to the state of holiness, to do teshuvah, as the trials and tribulations of Joseph. 

And then there is an episode of Joseph encountering an angel on his way to see his brothers, that bears allusion to the ‘Song of Songs’, as it uses the similar language.

37:15  וַיִּמְצָאֵהוּ אִישׁ וְהִנֵּה תֹעֶה בַּשָּׂדֶה וַיִּשְׁאָלֵהוּ הָאִישׁ לֵאמֹר מַה תְּבַקֵּשׁ

Then a man found him, and behold, he was straying in the field, and the man asked him, saying, "What are you looking for?"

37:16 וַיֹּאמֶר אֶת אַחַי אָנֹכִי מְבַקֵּשׁ הַגִּידָה נָּא לִי אֵיפֹה הֵם רֹעִים

And he said, "I am looking for my brothers. Tell me now, where are they pasturing?"

Song of Songs:

1:7 הַגִּידָה לִּי שֶׁאָהֲבָה נַפְשִׁי אֵיכָה תִרְעֶה

Tell me, you whom my soul loves, where do you pasture…?

Joseph was not just trying to improve his brothers, to bring them to repentance – he was seeking his brothers love!  He was that essential feminine soul of Israel seeking the love of God, through him God was seeking the love of man, longing to draw honey out of the rock of physical masculinity of his brothers.  It is about him, that pure soul of youth, that we pray in Avot:  and bring the redeemer to their children’s children for the sake of Your name, in love.